Heh!

I'm happy to have provided the impetus, though wow, what a sticky subject.

It is! I cannot remember when it was that I first met it, but I was very, very entertained because it was all so true.

When it's taken a person at a time, and one ignores whether that person is rude and nosy in the same way about other topics and to other people, sure. Very poor conduct and rude.

When we examine with context -- whether a single person has been rude to you and/or others in the same nosy fashion about other topics, and once there's a pattern of people who would otherwise not think to pry in the same way -- then it emerges as discriminatory.

But yes, I suspect that some of the people who would say "I can't be homophobic; I have a gay friend and I would never dream of beating someone up for being gay!" (and then imagine that's the limit of where homophobia stops) would take "You're being very nosy and rude!" much better than "Homophobic much?"

Pre-coffee stuff is to the real world what end-user confusion is to tech. So it's an acquired job skill.

Prior to some of the people pointing out how rude it all was, I hadn't even been thinking of it in that way, perhaps because I've never been heterosexual enough to realize that this wasn't totally normal.